Divorce Mediation
What is Mediation?
Mediation is a non-adversarial process that allows two spouses to work together to negotiate a settlement that is best for both of you and most importantly for your children. In Divorce Mediation, you and your spouse will meet with a neutral third party, the mediator, to work out an agreement regarding custody, parenting schedule, child support, alimony and distribution of marital assets and debts. By balancing the needs of both parties and the children and assisting the parties towards a compromise, the mediator helps the couple resolve their conflicts.
Virtual Mediation
Mediation sessions traditionally required both parties to be in the same physical location. These days, virtual mediation has become another acceptable option. Whether you live far apart or are just not totally comfortable with being in the same room together. Virtual sessions can be conducted in a more comfortable setting that might make it easier to put together a settlement that is acceptable to all sides.
Co-Mediation
While the traditional divorce mediation model has one mediator and two parties, there is a new trend for two mediators to work in conjunction with one another to add a different layer and dynamic to the Mediation process. Whether the mediators are a male/female team or an attorney/mental health professional or financial planner team, it provides the parties with multiple viewpoints to help work towards a more well-rounded settlement agreement. Attorney Bodie has not only worked as an individual mediator, she has also worked with other individuals in a co-mediation scenario. But don’t think that co-mediation will then be double the cost, it is not. Most co-mediators adjust their individual hourly rates to make this option affordable to the parties. If interested in this option, please call the office for more details.
The Emotional Divorce
It is said that divorce is 75% emotional and only 25% legal. Many times the emotions of the parties are what make settling a case so unbelievably difficult. Every party goes through their own grieving process at the loss of a marriage that was once so special and happy. Mediation, unlike the traditional adversarial divorce, allows parties to travel through the stages of the divorce at their own pace not the courts. It provides parties with a venue to deal with the emotional side of the divorce while also dealing with the legal and financial side. Mediation is not couple’s therapy but it does provide each party with a safe place to air out some of the more emotional aspects of the break-up.
Why Choose Mediation?
- Confidential
- Flexible (Your own time-table)
- Usually cheaper than traditional divorce litigation
- No trials
- No Winners or Losers
- Process is Voluntary (You can stop whenever you want)
- Future-oriented
- Mutual / Fair
- Both parties are present at all settlement sessions so they can communicate directly and reach agreements
What to Expect?
There are five phases to Mediation. Through all five phases, both parties will meet with the mediator together. Phase One is when the mediator and the parties will gather all of the information that will be needed to fully negotiate a settlement, including but not limited to, income, asset values, premarital assets, debt balances, values of real estates, etc. Phase Two will be when the mediator will help frame the issues. In other words, what agreements already exist, such as shared custody or who might be staying in the marital home, and what details still need to be resolved. Phase Three will focus on developing options ("brainstorming") to deal with these unresolved details. In Phase Four, the parties will negotiate the unresolved issues and then formalize the details into a Separation Agreement in Phase Five.
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first steps
If you and your spouse are considering an alternative to a traditional divorce such as mediation, you should both come in for the initial consultation. In Mediation, it is very important for a mediator to remain neutral and therefore all appointments will be joint with both parties present. -
legal advice
Mediators need to remain neutral and therefore cannot at any time render any legal advice to either party. Therefore, many parties going through the Mediation process decide to retain review counsel. Review Counsel is an attorney that does not attend the mediation sessions but is available to his/her client to provide legal advice and counseling. Review Counsel is not necessary but recommended by most mediators.